The Importance of Great Sex
by Mia Marlowe
by Mia Marlowe
Well, that title got your attention, didn’t it? As you know, my LORD OF FIRE AND ICE is out week! It’s a sensual, adventure-filled story with plenty of action, in and out of the sack. Here’s the blurb:
His duty is to fulfill her every desire...
Brandr the Far-Traveled has seen the world and a good many of the beautiful women in it. His bed skills are the stuff of steamy legend, his sword sings death, and he can call up fire from thin air. No one ever thought he could be enslaved through trickery and forced to wear the iron collar of a thrall—least of all him.
Until all she desires is him...
Katla the Black isn’t just called so for her dark, silky hair. His new mistress has a temper as fierce as a warrior’s and a heart as icy as the frozen North. But inch by delicious inch, Brandr means to make her melt...
Now back to our topic. I recently received an email from a reader who thanked me for my books and told me how much my stories meant to her. She also mentioned that her husband thanks me too, though he has yet to read one of them. He was evidently getting some peripheral benefits from his wife’s reading. ;-)
That’s fine with me. Sex is part of life, which is one of the reasons I don’t shy away from it in my books.
There is a certain mystique to being a romance writer. When I tell people I write historical romance, they often cast me a sidelong glance and I know what they’re thinking.
“She knows more about having sex than the average girl on the block.”
My DH encountered this assumption when he accompanied me to writing conferences. Once a reader who was familiar with my books gave him a long, slow once-over and said, “You must really be something.”
The naughty boy smiled and said, “Thank you, ma’am. I am!”
(Ok, in the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit he’s right!) But the point is, the love scenes in my books are not just about having great sex.
I hear a big “Huh?”
It’s true. I am passionately addicted to telling a good story. To accomplish that, every scene in my book has to perform important functions. They must:
1. Advance the story forward in a compelling manner.
2. Deepen the characters and/or their relationship.
3. Hopefully all at the same time!
So if a sex scene doesn’t perform one or more of these tasks, I have to cut it. If the scene could be replaced with the words, “Then they had sex.” And then there is no change in how the story proceeds because of the sex, then the scene is filler. I had an interesting discussion with a horror writer about gratuitous gore, which is that genre’s sex scene. He felt the same way about what he called “gorn” (gore porn). The gore, like a sex scene, has to serve a higher storytelling purpose.
When I write a sensual encounter for my characters, I want them to be different for having had the experience. I want it to change how they feel about themselves and each other. I want it to MATTER. Sex without context is pornography. Sex with meaning is one of the deepest expressions of what it is to be human.
Sex is a powder keg of emotions and sensations. It encapsulates themes of redemption, betrayal, acceptance and rejection. It’s the closest we can be to another person since we left our mother’s womb. How could I not write about it?
I want my readers (and my characters!) to have a good time. I also want it to mean something. If it doesn’t, the scene has no place in my story.
And now I’d love some feedback from YOU. Of course, we want our heroes to be terrific lovers, but what about the heroine? Do you prefer your heroine to be a virgin at the onset of the story or do you like one with a bit of life under her belt?
That’s fine with me. Sex is part of life, which is one of the reasons I don’t shy away from it in my books.
There is a certain mystique to being a romance writer. When I tell people I write historical romance, they often cast me a sidelong glance and I know what they’re thinking.
“She knows more about having sex than the average girl on the block.”
My DH encountered this assumption when he accompanied me to writing conferences. Once a reader who was familiar with my books gave him a long, slow once-over and said, “You must really be something.”
The naughty boy smiled and said, “Thank you, ma’am. I am!”
(Ok, in the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit he’s right!) But the point is, the love scenes in my books are not just about having great sex.
I hear a big “Huh?”
It’s true. I am passionately addicted to telling a good story. To accomplish that, every scene in my book has to perform important functions. They must:
1. Advance the story forward in a compelling manner.
2. Deepen the characters and/or their relationship.
3. Hopefully all at the same time!
So if a sex scene doesn’t perform one or more of these tasks, I have to cut it. If the scene could be replaced with the words, “Then they had sex.” And then there is no change in how the story proceeds because of the sex, then the scene is filler. I had an interesting discussion with a horror writer about gratuitous gore, which is that genre’s sex scene. He felt the same way about what he called “gorn” (gore porn). The gore, like a sex scene, has to serve a higher storytelling purpose.
When I write a sensual encounter for my characters, I want them to be different for having had the experience. I want it to change how they feel about themselves and each other. I want it to MATTER. Sex without context is pornography. Sex with meaning is one of the deepest expressions of what it is to be human.
Sex is a powder keg of emotions and sensations. It encapsulates themes of redemption, betrayal, acceptance and rejection. It’s the closest we can be to another person since we left our mother’s womb. How could I not write about it?
I want my readers (and my characters!) to have a good time. I also want it to mean something. If it doesn’t, the scene has no place in my story.
And now I’d love some feedback from YOU. Of course, we want our heroes to be terrific lovers, but what about the heroine? Do you prefer your heroine to be a virgin at the onset of the story or do you like one with a bit of life under her belt?
Mahalo, Mia, for your enlightening blog! Sourcebooks is offering a copy of LORD OF FIRE AND ICE to one randomly selected commenter. To enter the giveaway,
1. Respond to Mia's question - Do you prefer your heroine to be a virgin at the onset of the story or do you like one with a bit of life under her belt?
2. Sourcebooks' giveaway is open to US and Canadian residents ... but I'll giveaway the Hawaiian "Great Sex" prize to one international reader. Only the privileged few know what is the Hawaiian "Great Sex" prize!
3. Comments are open through Friday, July 13, 10 pm in Hawaii. I'll post the winner on Saturday, July 14.
Mahalo,
Kim in Hawaii
To learn more about Mia and her books, check out her website at www.miamarlowe.com.
I posted my review of LORD OF FIRE AND ICE on Amazon at this link and Goodreads at this link.
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| Oahu's birthing stones Hopefully the royal women had great sex as the birthing looks uncomfortable on these stones! |
It really does depend upon the story. In some cases one or the other just would not fit the scenario.
ReplyDeleteAgreed. But since I start with characters and build the story around them, I have to know about the heroine's past ahead of time.
DeleteThe situation of the heroine for me doesn't really matter specially if the book is good. Some people might even relate with the heroine and what they've been through.
ReplyDeleteGood point. That's why it's so important that the heroine be likeable and sympathetic. If I can't relate to the heroine, I'm likely to put the book down.
DeleteIt also depends on the storyline for me also, if the heroine is a widow that I do not except her to be a virgin. In contemporaries she doesn't have to a virgin.
ReplyDeleteInteresting that expectations are different for different sub-genres.
DeleteI enjoy both types of stories. It does really depend on the storyline. Sometimes I like the surprised ones.
ReplyDeleteLOL! Surprised by great sex. I like it!
DeleteI don't expect the heroine to always be a virgin. Personally, I feel that if the hero can bed who he likes, then maybe the heroine could have a little experience under her belt too. lol
ReplyDeleteIn historical romances I do prefer that the heroine is innocent. In the past it was frowned upon for a woman to have sex before marriage, and it's makes the heroine seem "loose" if she's had a lover/s already (unless she's a widow). Maybe I'm just old fashioned.
ReplyDeleteI read the title and laughed. :) It's certainly catchy! :)
ReplyDeleteI don't expect the heroine to be a virgin. I think it's a bit more interesting when the heroine has a bit of history actually....
The book...sounds like a really romantic one...would love to win 'Lord of Fire & Ice'...by Connie Mason w/Mia Marlowe......I have shared on facebook and twitter....babyruthmac16ATyahooDOTcom
ReplyDeleteI read mostly contemporaries, and I prefer if the heroine ISN'T a virgin. It just seems kind of unrealistic for most modern woman to be virgins. Especially a woman over the age of 30. Just my opinion.
ReplyDeleteI totally leave it up to the author - she knows her character best and it doesn't matter to me. I am sure it will fit the story either way.
ReplyDeleteTo me, it all depends on the plot and what's going on in the story. I believe that the heroine can be either because it has to fit her character.
ReplyDeleteIn a historical I do expect the heroine to be a virgin but in a contemporary I do not.
ReplyDeleteLOL!!! Fun post!!! It does depend on the story and time period. For the historicals, the virgin heroine is more realistic but for contemporaries I really prefer them not to be.
ReplyDeleteThanks and have a great night!
I like either one - but I think one with a bit of life under her belt is a touch more interesting. She's going to be a little more wary of the hero who is seducing her, has perhaps been hurt before, etc.
ReplyDeleteDoesn't matter to me, but I want them to have a lot of fun and laughs during it.
ReplyDeleteI like it to be true to the characters & the times. But either way it needs to be enjoyable for both parties, in fact it's great if they are both transported to ecstasy.
ReplyDeletesallans d at yahoo dot com
I don't mind either way.
ReplyDeleteI don't have a particular preference - depends on what is appropriate for the story.
ReplyDeleteI'm definitely in the corner that appreciates someone with a little life under their belts. Young widows in their late 20's are usually ideal.
ReplyDeleteMia I so agree with you. If a sex scene is just there for them to have sex, doesn't do anything for the story or emotionally then it is useless and I wish it were not there. Just like how I view sex in real life, there should be meaning to it.
ReplyDeleteAs for the heroine, I don't have a preference. The virgin or the well schooled lover, it all depends on what the story needs.
Great post!
I would agree with most and it depends on the story and/or genre of romance because I actually don't really have a strong preference either way.
ReplyDeleteI prefer heroines to be virgins. There was no greater possession for woman in the past than her "virtue." It creates an interesting tension with the hero and adds an element that may not be repeated for the character.
ReplyDeleteI don't have a preference. As long as the heroine's experience makes sense with her behavior then I don't care.
ReplyDeleteIf its critical to the character, then yes. However, I have read quite a few where the "virginity" of the character did not play a key role and the books was wonderful. One example that comes to mind is Claire in Outlander. Jamie, the hero, was the virgin and it was very sexy.
ReplyDeleteI think it depends on the story. I've loved reading about inexperienced heroines experiencing things for the first time and I've read about Heroines who had quite a few notches under their belt :)
ReplyDeleteI agree with Jolene, it depends on the story. Like Mia said,if it's just sex for sex and doesn't follow through on the story it becomes porn. But either way works for me :)
ReplyDeleteCarol L.
Lucky4750 (at) aol (dot) com